Children & Anxiety: Know the Signs

7 signs that your child may have an anxiety disorder

It’s normal for children to experience anxiety throughout their lives and they are often expected to feel it around certain situations. They may have first-day-of-school jitters or feel anxious about an exam or a sports game or have anxiety about starting something new, for example.

“All anxious moments are not cause for alarm. We all have anxiety as a protective measure introduced by evolution to let us know when something is not quite right,” Nerak Dickerson, Psy.D., a licensed clinical psychologist with Fort Worth’s The Telos Project explains. “It starts to become a problem when we consistently feel a heightened sense of concern in every or most situations. Our parasympathetic nervous system is not resetting, and we are running at full throttle all the time.”

When anxiety affects your child’s daily life by interfering with their home, school or social lives, you may need help from a professional.

Signs of anxiety in children

• Constantly worrying or having negative thoughts

• Having difficulty concentrating

• Eating too much or not enough

• Having sleep problems, such as waking in the night or having nightmares

• Exhibiting behavioral changes, including moodiness, angering quickly, temper tantrums, frequent crying spells or clinginess

• Complaining of stomach aches or feeling ill

• Experiencing bed wetting

It isn’t necessary for your child to exhibit every symptom. According to Dr. Dickerson, what should be of major concern is when the anxiety doesn’t seem to go away.

“Some anxiety disorders do stipulate a certain number of symptoms to meet criteria but not all. Parents need to look out for anxiety that is pervasive and ongoing. The anxiety will interfere with a child's motivation to engage with peers and family. It may cause them to isolate themselves, develop an inaccurate perception of who they are, and impair their social maturity.”

How to help your child with their anxiety

In addition to seeking professional help, there are things you can do consistently to help your child manage their anxiety. There are several tactics you can use that that will aid your child long-term and give them confidence in their ability to cope.

• Talk with your child about their anxiety, acknowledge what they are feeling and empathize

• Teach them to recognize the signs of their anxiety

• Help them understand their feelings and to find solutions

• Gently challenge unhelpful thinking

• Routines are reassuring, so try to stick to daily ones whenever possible

• Help them think of activities that work to reduce their anxiety

• Work with your child to pick one or more relaxation techniques that suits them. One easy technique includes taking three deep, slow breaths by breathing in for a count of three and out for a count of three. Other relaxation practices include mindfulness, yoga and meditation

• Create a “worry” box, whereby your child writes down or draws their concerns and puts them in the box. The box becomes a physical place to put their worries, and sorting through the box at the end of the day or week may also help. Self-soothe boxes have also been shown to be effective.

“Parents can help their child set small goals for things that they feel anxious about. They can also model what to do in anxiety-provoking situations and remember that their [own] anxiety as a child may not look like their child’s current anxiety and to not discount symptoms,” Dr. Dickerson suggests. “This is the quickest way to bring shame to the child and prevent them from opening up about what is going on. It is [also] important to normalize anxiety as best you can, be supportive and be patient with your child and yourself.”

Types of Anxiety Disorders

Anxiety disorders are mental health conditions that cause fear or distress around individual situations. They can also cause changes in behavior, sleeping habits and eating.

Some anxiety disorders that children commonly experience include:

• Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD). Children experiencing GAD worry excessively about a range of ordinary issues or situations

• Panic Disorder. This is a fear or dread over small things, or nothing at all. A child with panic disorder may have panic or anxiety attacks, have persistent worry and also have physical reactions—such as crying or hyperventilating—to stress

• Separation Anxiety Disorder. A child with separation anxiety disorder is usually older than three and feels severe homesickness and misery when they’re away from loved ones.

• Phobias. This is an intense and irrational fear of a certain thing or situation

• Social Anxiety Disorder. Children with social anxiety disorder have an intense fear of being watched and judged by others

“Although parents need to be on the lookout for certain anxiety symptoms, they also need to observe and monitor how these symptoms are impacting their child's functioning in several different areas,” Dr. Dickerson advises. “Impairment of functioning is a major factor in making or not making a diagnosis.”

Where to get help for your child

Early treatment of your child’s anxiety can prevent future problems like low self-esteem, loss of friendships and failure to thrive academically and socially. If your child is exhibiting symptoms of anxiety that persist, you should consider getting them evaluated by a qualified mental health professional.

“A child's pediatrician can provide medication for anxiety but will not test for the disorder, as this is not their area of expertise,” Dr. Dickerson explains. “Parents should seek services from a professional specializing in diagnosing and treating anxiety. This includes a licensed professional counselor, a clinical psychologist, a pediatric psychiatrist, or a clinical social worker.”

To find a mental health expert, contact your insurance provider. An internet search can help narrow the results even further for an expert that fits your child's needs.